'Not your grandfather's 65': Boomers are paying hundreds of thousands to live in luxe ‘resort-style’ communities — and redefining retirement

“Seniors are richer than ever, and this is not your grandfather’s 65,” John Tamny, founder and president of The Parkview Institute, told Moneywise. “Resort-style senior communities are priced for that buyer, so the boom is a wealth reading before it is a taste reading.”

Don’t call them nursing homes

Some seniors don’t view senior living centers as nursing homes — they see them as upscaled resort communities.

Take Donna Barker: 87-years-old and enjoying life at California-based Villa Marin. On a typical afternoon, she indulges in a daily martini before taking an elevator downstairs to dine in a high-end restaurant run by former French Laundry chef Ensan Wong.

“Initially, I didn’t come here for the food, but you can’t drag me away from here now,” she told CBS News.

Life at Villa Marin doesn’t come cheap. Residents own their apartments, which can cost up to $585,000 for a one-bedroom pad, plus a monthly HOA fee of up to $6,157, which covers amenities like housekeeping, paddle courts, a library, a salon and a highly-rated health center with on-site medical staff. Residents can even pair wines with the community’s own sommelier, while scanning a dinner menu that includes duck, lamb chops, chicken pate and aioli shrimp.

Senior living experts say upscale senior living communities like Villa Marin give older Americans with deep pockets exactly what they want later in life.

“Expectations around retirement have changed significantly,” Daniel Preston, founder of LiveInCare USA, a care-matching platform connecting families with live-in and in-home caregivers, told Moneywise. “Many older adults don’t see retirement as simply a period when they need somewhere safe to live. They want independence, social interaction, fitness, dining and an environment that supports the lifestyle they already enjoy.”

Rules to live by if you want to retire in a luxury retirement home

At over $6,000 a pop just for monthly HOA fees at Villa Marin, cost is a big issue for retirees, but it’s not the only one. Finance and retirement experts advise absorbing these factors when looking to land a gold-plated retirement home.

Take the long view

While many baby boomers have accumulated substantial home equity, retirement assets and other investments over several decades, timelines may be a bigger unknown.

“The important financial distinction is that a luxury retirement community isn’t just a housing decision; it’s potentially a 20- or 30-year lifestyle and healthcare decision,” Alex Langan, chief investment officer of Langan Financial Group, told Moneywise. “Someone can comfortably afford the lifestyle today and still find themselves financially stretched later if their care needs increase.”

Financial fears must be accounted for, and the sooner the better

Seniors eyeing a spot at a luxury senior community should also bring a holistic, pragmatic mindset to the table.

“There isn’t a universal number because affordability depends on the entire household balance sheet: guaranteed income, investment assets, home equity, taxes, health care costs, spending habits, debt, life expectancy and how much financial flexibility the person wants to retain,” Langan noted.

The better question is this: after paying for the community, does the retiree still have enough financial flexibility to absorb inflation, market volatility, health care expenses and potentially years of additional care?

“For example, I wouldn’t want someone to put nearly all of their liquid retirement assets into an entrance fee simply because the community is beautiful and affordable based on today’s monthly payment,” Langan added.

Don’t underestimate these top senior home expenses

One common, but costly, mistake retirees make when evaluating high-end retirement communities is focusing on the wrong cash management timeline.

“The biggest error is looking at the advertised monthly cost and treating that as the total cost of retirement,” Langan said.

In particular, people need to understand exactly what their contract includes and what it doesn’t.

“That can include additional charges for assisted living, memory care, medication management, transportation, personal care, specialized healthcare, meals outside the standard package, guest services and other lifestyle expenses,” Langan noted.

Another easy-to-overlook issue: the cost of aging isn’t necessarily linear.