1. Selfish to the bone
Me and my mother-in-law go way back on our problems. She came to our wedding drunk, threw a fit at the wedding, and left us and my family to clean up afterwards. I CLEANED UP AFTER MY OWN WEDDING.
Then not even a month later, we got a letter in the mail that property taxes hadn’t been paid on the house we lived in at the time. It was her house, but we took over all the bills when we got married.
She told us that since we lived there, we had to pay them. It was a ridiculous amount and it cost us all the money we were given from the wedding. It was sad because we didn’t get to use the extra cash on anything we had planned.
Now it’s almost four years later and I have a one-year-old baby. When I gave birth to my son, COVID precautions were still in full swing and I could only have two people in the delivery room. I chose my husband and my mom.
But since my mother-in-law works for the hospital I had the baby in, she threw a fit to the administration and came into the room anyway. My baby was born at only thirty-two weeks so it was a high-stress situation. I just wanted her out of there. She was bossing doctors around even though she’s just an ultrasound tech.
Then she threw me a baby shower that I didn’t even want to have because my son was in the NICU.
2. A new gift everyday
My son is four months old. I’m very intentional about the products coming into our home and the baby’s life. This means looking for the safest items, gender-neutral and organic clothing, as well as non-toxic and educational toys. We also try to limit the number of unnecessary items in our home.
Well, my mother-in-law could be considered a hoarder. Every room in her home is packed with stuff. Every day since my son was born, she has bought him something. Her entire guest bedroom is filled with baby clothes and toys (most of which he won’t even be able to use until he’s older). On top of all that, these products are nothing like what we kindly requested.
My husband has nicely told her to stop several times, but there is no end in sight. Today, she bought him a jogging stroller (after we just bought him one — he doesn’t need multiple), a basketball hoop and scooter. It’ll be years before he is using a scooter!
We’ve tried to tell her to clear things with us before buying them, but it makes her mad. Any time I try to tell her the reason I prefer specific brands or products over another she makes comments about my “expensive taste.”
I’m a veterinarian who worked very hard to be where I’m at. So if I want to spend my money on items I feel are best for my son, I can. It’s getting to a point where I’m super angry and resentful.
3. Pathological liar
I caught my mother-in-law in a major lie. My fiancé and I have been together for eight years and I have always felt that she doesn't like me.
Back in May of 2020, he had a plan to propose to me, which involved taking a trip. He had told his mother of his plan, and the day before we were supposed to leave for our trip, she suddenly came down with appendicitis.
We obviously canceled our trip. She had surgery to have her appendix taken out and my partner picked her up from the hospital and took her home. Since it was Covid, no one could be in the hospital with her.
I found out her lie because I worked at a doctor’s office, which she attended. Well, the emergency room faxed over the report from her hospital stay. When I handed the report to the doctor, I told him that she’d had her appendix taken out.
Ten minutes later he called me into his office and corrected me. He told me that the report said she had gone to the hospital for back pain, and that there was no surgery. I kept this to myself because I didn’t want to upset my fiancé.
Then the other night, she called with major stomach pains and cramps, so we took her to the ER, and low and behold, she had appendicitis! I asked the doctor if the appendix can grow back because she had her appendix taken out in May of 2020. Her face turned white, and my fiancé had to walk out of the room.
4. Pinky promise
A few weeks ago, my boyfriend told his mom that he had given me a promise ring while he saved enough money for an actual engagement ring. He explained to her that it was a promise to marry me in the future.
She pretended like she didn’t hear him at first so he said it again. The second time he said it, she replied, “Oh really? Let me see?” in a super high-pitched voice.
I was on my period at the time and I’d finally found a comfortable position on the couch where I was pretty much pain free (almost cramp-less), so I handed the ring off to him on his way to the bathroom and he handed it to her and she looked at it for a bit.
The second that he closed the bathroom door, she put it on her ring finger! It didn’t fit so she proceeded to put it on her pinky finger — the only finger the ring fit on.
Now mind you, I’m a curvy, plus-sized gal that dresses well and wears whatever I want, when I want. She’s made negative comments about my appearance before. She outright disrespects larger people as if she herself doesn’t have a gut.
So it was funny to me that my ring fits me but doesn’t even fit her pinky because she’s always called me big behind my back. By the time my boyfriend had gotten out of the bathroom she was back to just looking at it.
5. She skipped my son’s funeral
I started dating my boyfriend five years ago. I did not meet his family for the first handful of months so by the time I did, we had been seeing each other for a while. The only things they said to me were snide comments about my tattoos/appearance.
The next time I saw his mom, she pretended like I didn’t exist. Over the next three years, during which time we’d see his family at holidays, I was able to express to my boyfriend that I felt his mom didn’t like me and went out of her way to be rude to me.
Fast forward to October 2020 when we found out we were expecting our first baby. My mother-in-law dropped off a Mother’s Day gift with presents only for my partner and our baby. I didn’t expect anything else so I wasn’t shocked.
When I eventually gave birth and we brought our baby home, I made every effort to make sure she could spend time with him. She started being kind, so I let her in. Then at three months old, my son died of SIDS and all her kindness disappeared.
The morning of my son’s funeral she called my partner. She was upset that I did not want our 10-month-old nephew at the service. She called me all sorts of nasty names, then proceeded to skip our son’s funeral.
We went no contact for a while, but my partner is aware I planned on staying no contact for good. Well, we are now pregnant again and she’s weaseling her way back into her son’s life. I refuse to let her be a part of another child’s life after the way she disrespected my son.
6. Lying, stealing and cheating
I am happily married now, however my mother-in-law is a whole other story. After our wedding, my father-in-law’s health declined and he went into a coma. My husband and I paid 100% of his parents’ expenses from the U.S. by working three jobs each.
But my mother-in-law lied about the cost — she told us that her husband needed certain meds and would ask us to send more money. She would then use the money to fund local trips that she hid from us.
She ordered a new TV, microwave, fridge and phone. When we visited India and asked her about the new items, she would tell us she got them in an exchange offer or that she’d sold her jewelry to buy them. My naive husband believed her. Meanwhile, my father-in-law was no longer in coma but was paralyzed from the chest down. When our kid was born, my mother-in-law insisted that we visit India so her husband could see his grandchild.
He had a heart attack and his health worsened. My husband was the only one paying the bills at this point so we had to go back to the U.S., but my mother-in-law asked him to let me stay for mental support.
When I finally came home, I discovered that she’d stolen money from my bank account in India. She was having an affair and spending the money on her boyfriend. My father-in-law passed away and she came to stay with us in the U.S. for a few weeks, at which point I finally broke down and told my husband everything.
I had proof and family members who witnessed her behavior and saw her with her boyfriend.
7. A walking virus
My boyfriend and I just had a baby two months ago and my mother-in-law doesn’t respect my boundaries. I’m very worried about germs, but she kisses my newborn on his face anyway. My sister even told me she caught her kissing him on the lip (a big no). She doesn’t wash her hands before she holds him.
She comes straight into our room from outside and doesn’t wash or sanitize her hands. She also put A&D ointment (butt rash cream) in his hair without my consent! Who puts A&D in a baby's hair?! She also picks him up when he’s sleeping, which is selfish because he and I are both losing sleep! And she doesn’t put him back to sleep afterwards, so he’s fussy.
My boyfriend asked her to start washing her hands before she held the baby, especially when coming from outside and she got so upset. She yelled at him and said it was going to be “hell” if she can’t hold him anymore. Now she hasn’t spoken to us or seen the baby since that incident last week. This morning I was on a Zoom call for work and I asked my boyfriend to change the baby and bring him back so I could feed him.
He decided to bring him upstairs to his mom without telling me instead. I feel like she will continue to not follow our rules because he gave in so quickly. I don’t want her unsupervised with my baby until she can understand she’s wrong.
8. Our pregnancy announcement became an interrogation
I had a cringe pregnancy announcement because of my mother-in-law. It went something like this:
Father-in-law and mother-in-law came to our yard for a barbeque. My husband was in the yard wearing an “I’m going to be a Dad” shirt. It took them a moment but they realized what was happening.
It was 3 p.m. on a Sunday and I noticed right away that my mother-in-law was beyond wasted. So the following questions/comments ensue:
“How many times did you have to try before you got pregnant?”
“What day did you conceive? Especially what day, I need to know.”
“Did a certain position do the trick?”
“Try your best not to gain too much weight, I lost weight when I was pregnant.”
“Does your mother even care that you’re pregnant?”
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
“What are you going to name the baby?”
“When did you stop birth control?”
And finally, she said “I can’t believe you did this behind my back” in a very angry voice, followed by tears.
Then she cried for 25 minutes saying “I’m going to hold that baby so tight” over and over. She was too upset to eat after that so they left.
9. Almost a tragedy
Once my mother-in-law was very drunk while she was holding my baby. It was in the middle of the day and everyone was standing around. She was rocking her over and over again, and I started to get this terrible feeling, so I just grabbed her out of her arms.
My baby was blue in the face. Without realizing it my mother-in-law had been slowly smothering her in the rocking chair with her sweater. I blew breath into my three-month-old baby’s lungs and my mother-in-law was so offended that she ran upstairs and wailed loudly. No one said anything. No one admitted that what happened actually happened. It was never spoken about again.
She continues to drink at the same rate to this day. And no one ever questions her as a safety issue. When I was pregnant, she cried her eyes out when we told her. She basically said that I had ruined her life and her whole family. Sometimes I still cry thinking of those moments.
10. Severe allergies and zero trust
When my mother-in-law found out I was pregnant with my first child, she told me and my husband that she wanted to beat the hell out of us. She told him that he was stupid for getting me knocked up because he would be tied to me for the rest of his life … we were already married.
Before that, she had been trying her best to break us up. After my baby was born, she then tried her best to harm her, in my opinion. You see, I am allergic to everything. I can't even sit outside in the grass without breaking out in hives. I have a severe allergy to citrus, etc. etc. The list of my allergies is too long to type here.
When my daughter was about 3-4 months old, my mother-in-law wanted to give her catnip tea because she said she was hivey. I threw a fit and put a dead stop to that right away. I told her and my husband that there was no way she was giving my baby anything ever. If by chance my daughter had even a few of my allergies, they could hurt her. So I told my husband that if his mother ever did it behind my back then she would NEVER see our daughter ever again.
Needless to say my daughter did not stay alone with his parents until she was old enough to talk and could tell me everything that went on while she was there.
11. “My baby”
I’ve always been polite and respectful of my husband’s mom even though I didn’t like the way she parented. From the first day I met her, I knew she was a “smother” and my husband was a momma's boy. Now we’re married and we had our first baby in August 2021. My mother-in-law has been a nightmare ever since.
She would kiss the baby on the face and mouth constantly even after I told her directly not to. If my baby would whimper or cry in the slightest she would say something like, “Oh no, what’s wrong, my baby?” or even take her from me. If she fell while playing or bumped her head or anything, my mother-in-law would make remarks like it was my fault.
And so this brings us to the latest thing. We just went on vacation and sent my mother-in-law some pictures in which my (pale) baby had some red cheeks. I wouldn’t call it a sunburn, but we were outside all day and her cheeks got a little red.
My baby had multiple applications of sunscreen and wore a hat. My mother-in-law acted like I just left her out in the sun to die. And EVERY DAY since, she has texted me to put sunscreen on her or to not leave the house at all.
It gets under my skin so much when she says “how is my baby,” “is MY baby okay?” The “sunburn” didn’t affect her at all, but almost every day my mother-in-law asks, “Is my baby feeling better today?”
12. Obsessed and overbearing
My mother-in-law is obsessed with my husband and son. It’s to the point that she has said she wants to see us every day to be a part of our life. If I use anything of my husband’s, she gets angry. So now she emphasizes that anything she gives him is only for him, even if it’s just as simple as a phone charger.
Then with my son, she deliberately will ignore what I ask her not to do and tells me very sweetly that she’s going to do it because of her own reason. If I'm doing something, she will hover over my shoulder and keep asking for my child. Or if she has him and he cries, she won’t give him back when I ask. She ignores me.
She has called my son my husband’s name by “accident,” and acts like I’m supposed to just hand him over every second. She also tells me what he likes best as if he’s not my child. My husband advises me to speak up, but I feel like I’m at constant war. If I’m alone with her, she’ll do it more openly, but in front of him she acts innocent. If I try to say something, she acts like I’m crazy.
I just want her to leave us alone, but she keeps trying to persuade me to leave my baby with her and go on a trip or leave to go have “me” time. I don’t want to and she keeps pushing.
13. Unwanted changes
My husband and I went on holiday not long ago. We left his parents our key so that they could feed the fish and water our plants. When we arrived back home, we were exhausted from a long flight followed by a drive to the house. It was two in the morning when we finally got in.
When we opened the front door, my jaw dropped. Our living room had been totally rearranged. Then I walked through to the kitchen/dining room. There was a new, hideous dining room table where our old one used to be. Then I went to our bedroom. It too had been rearranged! I was livid.
So there we were, at 2 a.m., rearranging our whole house back to normal. And that was not the worst part. I cannot stress enough how literal I am when I say that we went on to find that every single shelf, cupboard and drawer in the house had been gone through and reorganized as well.
It took days for me to put everything back.
14. Dog attack
First off, I am fine. I’m more scared than anything. The bruising is minor and the bites didn’t seriously injure me, but my mother-in-law watched the attack happen and didn’t say anything.
Her 140 lb dog jumped up at me repeatedly and kept biting my arms and grabbing hold of my arm, almost dragging me to the ground. The dog is big enough that she could wrap her entire mouth around my arm, basically crushing my arm. It hurt but didn’t break the skin. During the attack, I remember being aware that my arm was in the dog's mouth numerous times.
The dog likes to play rough and play fight with other dogs, but this was unexpected and unprovoked. I felt fear and didn’t know what to do. I just stood still and hoped the dog would let go of me.
After twenty seconds, the dog stopped coming at me and ran off because it got distracted by something else. My mother-in-law didn’t say anything despite being four feet from where it happened.
Later in the evening she made a comment in passing that the dog can be “intimidating and show affection roughly.”
I didn’t think the bites were that bad until the next day when I saw visible bruising and experienced pain. I’m angry that my mother-in-law didn’t do anything and now I don’t feel safe around that dog.
15. Covid and eviction
My mother-in-law and I have never really gotten along all that well, but we didn’t see each other often, so it worked. Cut to the pandemic and my husband and I both lost our jobs, defaulted on everything and had to move in with my mother-in-law.
We put all our belongings into a storage unit that we pay for. For the past two years, we have lived with her while paying what we can and trying to regain our financial independence. It has been hard.
We both got new jobs and got out of about $45,000 worth of debt in two years. Meanwhile she has consistently reminded us of how much of a burden we are to her. It has hurt my husband tremendously.
Then yesterday, my mother-in-law tested positive for Covid and didn’t tell us immediately. When we expressed concerns about being near her, she got so angry. She then told us she was kicking us out and that we needed to leave as quickly as possible. Of course that’s kind of hard when you’ve been exposed to Covid.
However, I spent the day calling apartments and we found one that works for us. We applied online and got approved so we’ll be moving out in about two weeks.
The problem now is once we move, we really think little-to-no contact will be the best option. She brings us down so badly and makes us feel like scum under her shoes. We are grateful for the help the last two years but she has pushed us too far.
16. Unwanted weight watching
My mother-in-law thinks I’m a bad influence on my husband because I’m plus size. I’ve gained some weight on Prozac, so I’m now on the low end of plus size. My husband’s whole family is rail thin.
Basically, my mother-in-law sat me down to say that they’re worried for my husband because I am a bad influence on his health. She didn’t ask or inquire about my health or my habits, she just let me know she doesn’t like it. She stated it like it was a fact. I told her about the Prozac and I think she didn’t believe me.
For context, I do yoga and strength training several times a week. My husband is less than 200 lbs and I can pick him up off the ground. I’m always the one adding vegetables to our meals. He’s tall and thin, so he eats whatever he wants, never works out, but since I’m the one who’s not naturally thin I’m “the unhealthy one.”
Apparently, my mother-in-law has been talking about this for months. My husband knew and never told me. Like a lot of women, I’ve dieted since I was a preteen. I’ve made myself sick from not eating for days. I’ve done everything there is to do. I have finally been working on accepting myself and this feels like it’s set me back years. I’ve cried about this a lot. It was humiliating.
17. Boundaries? What boundaries?
My mother-in-law, we will call her Ashley, drinks pretty heavily. About two months ago, Ashley and my mother started to hang out. Ashley was being inappropriate towards my mom, but she insisted she wasn’t “like that” so it doesn’t count.
Well, one night they were hanging out and Ashley started drinking a lot. My mom was drinking too and me and my boyfriend walked in on them kissing.
I scolded my mom and she did her part to make it up to me. My mom quit drinking and apologized multiple times and even agreed to never hang out with her again. I’m still a little upset at the situation. But Ashley did nothing. She blamed my mom and did not apologize.
So, I have been refusing to talk to her or go over to their house. And she said that I was a bad person.
Two weeks ago it took a turn. My mom was having a barbecue and invited my boyfriend's dad and stepmom, who she gets along great with. His stepmom is her hairdresser and her workout buddy. But she didn’t invite Ashley since she thought it would be awkward.
Ashley took offense and said it was wrong for my mom to not invite her. My mom even said we could have another barbecue with just her. Later that night, my boyfriend called me crying saying that Ashley was calling him, me, and my mother names. She called me stupid, a even some racial slurs. She called my mother dumb as well.
18. Crazy jealous
My ex mother-in-law was a very jealous woman to the point of accusing her own daughters of wanting and flirting with her husband (their stepdad). She would kick them out of the house when they were just teens. At family gatherings at her house, she would make her husband stay in their room so the women wouldn't look at him (even though he wasn't much to look at lol).
Well, me and my then-husband had to stay with this crazy woman for a short time. I have three daughters from a previous relationship (my then-husband was not their dad). From the moment my girls and I stepped foot in my mother-in-law’s house, things were weird. She had a problem with how my girls dressed. It was summer time so their attire was shorts and tank tops.
One day we all sat down for dinner and my oldest daughter got up to grab a cup to pour herself a drink. She had to reach up in the cabinet and her shirt came up some and you could see her belly.
I noticed her husband excused himself to go to his bedroom, then the crazy woman's attitude changed towards my girls. She went from this loving caring woman who had told them to call her grandma, to acting like their very presence bothered her.
Later that night, my husband came and scolded me for upsetting his mom. It was then that I knew I had to get out of there ... It took me a month to get the money together and leave.
19. Comparing salaries
My mother-in-law asked my wife how much my mother makes. This is not a usual topic of conversation in our family so my wife made up an arbitrary number of $100,000 and told this to my mother-in-law.
Well, about a month later my mother-in-law came back to my wife and said, "There is no way that your mother-in-law can make that much money."
Apparently, she had called my mother's place of employment and asked if anyone made more than $100,000. She claims that she was told by my mom's work that no one makes that much money.
She finished this explanation by saying that she was glad that my mother didn't make that much, because she "wanted to be the rich grandma" and it was her job to spoil the kids.
To make matters worse, she can’t be “the rich grandma” anyway. Because, as you can imagine, that status is hard to achieve when she has no money, and doesn't even work!
This woman is crazy.
20. Truly nonsense
Shall we tally the horrible, ridiculous things that my mother-in-law has said to me? Let’s.
She said that she gave birth to my son.
She has called me fat multiple times. I weigh 110 pounds and I am 5'5".
She interrupts me when I'm talking about politics because she seems to think it’s "not appropriate talk for women."
She told me that it's too bad my husband didn't marry my best friend instead.
She told me that no one thought my husband and I would make it.
She threw holy water in my son's face after she found out we weren't having him baptized.
When I was pregnant, I woke up from a dream where I had a miscarriage. I was about 20 weeks along. She came into my room and saw me crying and having an anxiety attack. She said "I once had a dream that I miscarried at 20 weeks. The baby died."
21. Poisoned with pork
My fiance and I got engaged two months ago. I still lived with my parents at that time because we were planning to get another place in another town. Then my fiance’s dad died and that changed our plans. So I told my fiance that I'd be fine living with him and his family (my mother-in-law and brother-in-law) for now. I moved in.
Two days before his father’s funeral, I experienced a bad bladder and stomach infection that made it difficult to walk, but I tried keeping it together for the sake of the funeral. The church service was done and the burial as well.
We went back to the church to eat, but at that point I couldn't walk any longer. My fiance then asked my mother-in-law if she could please hurry because I was in bad pain (we’d all driven in one car.)
I had to go to the hospital, but received medical care right away. They told me it was because I had eaten pork, which I’d never eaten before — my body couldn't process it and so it caused a serious infection in my stomach and bladder.
The next day at home my fiance overheard his mom telling her friend that I was stealing her son and that she’d made pork tonight on purpose so I'd get sick.
They had a fight about it and suddenly she started screaming to him that "she's a s***" and that I could've held in the pain for the eating part of the church service. She proceeded to tell him that I'm fat and don't even have a job (I'm currently studying) and I'm only interested in his money.
22. Get. Out.
My mother-in-law comes and stays with us a few times each year. Every time she says it'll be a week and then it turns into three, four, sometimes five!
She doesn't clean up after herself and she makes a far larger mess than we normally do. She expects dinner to be made for her at 6 p.m. every night. She doesn't let anyone else get a word in any conversation, and she treats us like we're failures. It's just constant judgment about how we live our lives, from our jobs, to raising our kids, to the cleanliness of our home.
She invites people over without saying anything to us. She is loud at all hours. She even bought a bed for her to use when she's here. She sleeps in the den and we have nowhere to store the giant mattress she bought, so now it's just constantly in our way.
I want my husband to tell her she can't stay with us anymore, but the only reason we let her stay is because she let us borrow money to buy the house and we're still paying her back. It's insane and I just want her to never stay with us again.
23. She gave my baby Covid
We just had a baby, and my mother-in-law wanted to live with us. Despite my request that she come after September when I would be going back to work and the baby would be older, she came right away.
She came to our house after traveling in multiple states along the east coast for a month. Three days afterwards, we all got sick, including my infant. The baby got a fever in the middle of the night and we rushed to the ER. The baby had Covid.
Later, my baby recovered from the fever, but retained a lingering cough. We all got tested, and we all tested positive for Covid. I felt so sad that after all the care I gave to my baby, he still couldn’t escape from Covid, all because of his grandma’s insistence.
The day after we moved to our new house, she insisted on visiting again. But we had just moved! I was exhausted! My significant other just couldn’t bring himself to tell his mom to wait until the next day.
This visit was the same as the last, she insisted that she must come live with us in July. And of course she pays for nothing. She does cook, but one meal a day, with only one dish.
To make matters worse, she doesn’t help with the baby. Well that’s not true — she held the baby a couple of times, and coughed on him, and gave him Covid.
24. We can’t share a bed
My girlfriend and I booked a four-day trip to Hawaii this upcoming fall and my mother-in-law exploded. She doesn't condone the two of us vacationing together if we don't get separate bedrooms. She wants to be sure that we aren’t sharing a bed. She states that we should cancel the trip and show her receipts of all the refunds.
My girlfriend works part time and still goes to school, so she can't afford to move out from her parent’s home. Her mom has a homophobic history and has never wanted to get to know any of her daughter's girlfriends, but has been interested in meeting past love interests that are men.
Her mother's control has been an ongoing issue in our entire relationship. My girlfriend can't even attend my family parties without my mother-in-law blowing up her phone asking when she'll be home. She texts her every hour to find out where she is (even if she's just at the gym). She needs to know every detail about any plans she makes.
Eventually we had to cancel the trip because my girlfriend’s sister gave her an ultimatum saying if she went then she'd cut contact with her. I care more about my girlfriend's mental health and ultimately decided it was best to not further any conflict until she's free from their household.
25. Eviction notice
So, my husband has been in jail for almost a year now. We have been married/living together for five years. He already owned the house when I met him. Come to find out this entire time the house has been in his mothers name for “tax purposes.” I have never gotten along with his mother, she’s always hated me for just simply existing. Two months ago, my mother-in-law and I had a huge fight.
She kept coming over to my house when I wasn’t home, she would take my personal belongings and snoop through everything in my house. [She’d] tell me I’m not allowed to have people over, she would call me out for simply having things plugged in like my coffee maker or if I left a fan on while I went to work. I finally had enough and blew up and banned her from ever coming by again.
So, she started spending the night. I would come home from work and she would be there in my spare bedroom. If I made a noise at all, she would come out screaming at me that it’s her house and I need to be quiet … I legit just dealt with this crazy behavior from a 71-year-old woman for the sake of my husband.
I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to call the cops and turn it into a huge deal … until she threw me on the ground and spit in my face.
At that point I had her [charged with trespassing]. Well, two months later I got served with eviction paperwork. My husband knew nothing about this. So, I’m scrambling to figure out everything now.
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