Mar 21, 2024
Giving up paid work to raise children is a complex decision. But considering a return to the workforce after the kids reach adulthood could be even more challenging. That’s the situation for a husband from New Jersey who wrote into The Ramsey Show seeking advice.
Barry said his wife wasn't keen on working again after raising four children to adulthood. He admitted he's not sure how he feels about it. “Is she a princess for not wanting to go back to work?” he asked. “Or do I just need to suck it up and change my attitude?”
Advertisement
Co-host Rachel Cruze had a clear answer: “I think he needs an attitude change,” she said. “I don’t think she’s being a princess.”
Thanks for subscribing!
Read the best of Moneywise in 5 minutes or less.
By signing up, you accept Moneywise Terms of Use, Subscription Agreement, and Privacy Policy.
However, co-host Ken Coleman wanted to see if there were more ways for the couple to handle the dilemma.
The rapidly evolving workforce
Roughly 26% of moms stay at home to care for their children, according to Pew Research’s analysis of population surveys. Most Americans might be aware of the challenges that come with giving up employment to raise kids, but the difficulties of going back to work after decades out of the labor market are sometimes overlooked.
The job market is rapidly evolving. Barry said his wife had been focused on the kids for roughly 20 years, which is plenty of time for her prior work experience to be out of sync with the current market.
She might also face some age discrimination. Sixty-four percent of workers aged 40 and older say they have either seen or experienced age discrimination in the workplace in recent years, according to a survey by AARP. Barry and his wife are both in their 50s, so this could be another hurdle.
Meanwhile, a survey from job portal Indeed found that 73% of women re-entering the workforce reported encountering biases in the hiring process due to their former status as a stay-at-home mom.
Facing these challenges may have been unavoidable if the couple faced financial pressure, but Barry claimed that isn’t the issue. He earns $125,000 a year, and the couple’s net worth is over $1.6 million. They’ve used Dave Ramsey’s ‘baby steps technique’ to eliminate nearly all their debt. They only have an outstanding mortgage of $80,000 on a house that is worth $700,000.
“We’re doing well,” Barry admitted. “Our lives and our marriage are great.” However, he believes additional income would help them pay off the mortgage sooner and help him retire early.
Advertisement
The co-hosts remained unconvinced.
Must Read
- The ultra-rich use these 5 real estate strategies to build wealth while they sleep — you can start with just $100
- Here’s the average income of Americans by age in 2026. Are you keeping up or falling behind?
- Insurance companies profit most from drivers who auto-renew without shopping around. Comparing 100+ quotes takes 2 minutes and costs nothing
Join 250,000+ readers and get Moneywise’s best stories and exclusive interviews first — clear insights curated and delivered weekly. Subscribe now.
Cruze and Coleman’s advice
“If they had two car payments and $15,000 of credit card debt, she has to get back to work,” Cruze said. But the couple clearly isn’t in this position. “[Barry’s wife] worked hard with the kids… he’s doing fine financially… she’s 50-plus years old; she’s enjoying her life.”
Cruze recommended the couple have an honest conversation about their expectations and strike a balance between his desire to retire early and her lifestyle expectations. This would also help the couple resolve any lingering resentment that may be building and harming their marriage.
“If you’re asking us twice… ‘Is she a princess?’” Coleman said to Barry, “that tells me you are feeling some resentment toward her that’s got to get fixed.”
You May Also Like
- JP Morgan sees gold hitting $6,000/oz before 2027 — and a Gold IRA lets you hold the physical metal while deferring the tax bill. Get your free guide from Priority Gold
- Dave Ramsey warns nearly 50% of Americans are making 1 big Social Security mistake — here’s what it is and the simple steps to fix it ASAP
- Thanks to Jeff Bezos, you can now become a landlord for as little as $100 — and no, you don't have to deal with tenants or fix freezers. Here's how
- Millionaires under 43 are reshaping investing — just 25% of their portfolios are in stocks. Here’s where their money is going
Vishesh Raisinghani is a financial journalist covering personal finance, investing and the global economy. He's also the founder of Sharpe Ascension Inc., a content marketing agency focused on investment firms. His work has appeared in Moneywise, Yahoo Finance!, Motley Fool, Seeking Alpha, Mergers & Acquisitions Magazine and Piggybank.
