Dec 17, 2025
Financial abuse is considered the “most pervasive form of domestic abuse” — the National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV) says that it occurs in 99% of domestic violence cases (1).
It is defined as a situation where one partner uses money to control or manipulate the other partner. This can include limiting their access to money and financial information, including how much money they have as a couple, restricting spending and preventing them from becoming independent financially.
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One caller to The Ramsey Show in November highlighted how financial abuse commingles with other forms of abuse and can be used to make someone feel helpless (2).
Jackie from Cincinnati, Ohio told hosts George Kamel and Rachel Cruze her husband has been “verbally, emotionally, and financially abusive.” She went on to explain “last night [that] crossed over into physical abuse and he was arrested.”
While Jackie’s story is shocking, it also highlights the serious impact of financial abuse. As she told the hosts, “I’m in a situation where my husband is threatening to remove me from all the accounts, the credit cards, and threatening to leave me with zero … He says I'll need to go prostitute myself in order to have money, which is terribly sick.”
Jackie says her husband, the sole breadwinner, is very knowledgeable about financial matters and he’s taking advantage of her ignorance. Their kids are in college, and she wanted the hosts to advise her on how she can protect herself financially.
Your rights as a spouse
Jackie told The Ramsey Show hosts she and her husband have a joint account and she is an authorized user on his credit card. He has a separate account in which he keeps the money he receives from his mother.
A stunned Cruze advised, “When you get off the phone with us, I would drive to the bank, and I would create a new checking account. I would take half of the money that is in that joint checking account and I would put it over to your own checking account that he has zero access to.”
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She also suggested that Jackie stay in a hotel until she can get the support of friends and family.
“You deserve better than this, Jackie,” she said, making it clear that divorce is the only path forward she sees. The Ramsey Show usually recommends merging finances, but Cruze said when it comes to things like abuse and addiction, separate accounts are needed for protection.
“He knows that he’s holding all the cards,” said Kamel. “I think when he realizes, oh she’s not coming back, oh she created her own accounts, oh she took half the money … I don’t think he’s going to be laughing then, when the courts demand that he pay alimony or child support, whatever it may be … There’s laws that protect you here.”
Since Jackie is only an authorized user on the credit card, she would not be responsible for any debt on that account. As for the joint account, “in most cases, either state law or the terms of the account prevent someone from removing the other person from a joint checking account without their consent. Some banks, though, may offer accounts where they allow this type of removal,” according to the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB).
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Protecting yourself from financial abuse
“Financial abuse is devastatingly effective because it’s often not illegal, and it is an invisible tactic of domestic violence,” said Kim Pentico, director of economic justice programs, National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV) (3). “Women literally don’t have money for cab fare, to buy food and other necessities of life, often forcing them to choose between homelessness and being battered. It is a profoundly powerless situation for these women.”
“Any woman can become a victim of financial abuse, regardless of economic or social status,” said John Rugel, senior vice president, life customer fulfillment and underwriting at Allstate.
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It’s important to note that as a joint account holder, you have equal rights and shared ownership of all funds in any bank accounts you own, regardless of who deposited the money. While a financially controlling spouse may try to block your access to the account or information about the account, you have the right to know as much as you want to know about your family finances.
Since women tend to be more vulnerable to abuse in relationships, some financial gurus like Kevin O’Leary advise them to sign prenuptial agreements and keep their finances separate even after marriage. This can give women the financial freedom to easily leave an abusive relationship — something Jackie’s situation demonstrates that too few women have.
If you feel like your spouse is financially abusive and may use your information to open up accounts in your name or access your accounts, you can call your bank and credit card companies to change your account numbers, PIN numbers, passwords, and any other access codes. It’s very important to select passwords that your spouse or others will not be able to guess. Also make sure that any computers or devices you use to access your banking information are safe and password protected. Some abusers install spyware on their partner’s devices, so be sure yours are free of any suspicious programs.
If you believe you are a victim of financial abuse, or any other form of abuse, you can seek help and support immediately by contacting the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1.800.799.SAFE (7233).
Article sources
We rely only on vetted sources and credible third-party reporting. For details, see our editorial ethics and guidelines.
National Network to End Domestic Violence (1); The Ramsey Show Highlights/YouTube (2); The Allstate Foundation (3)
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Rebecca Holland is dedicated to creating clear, accessible advice for readers navigating the complexities of money management, investing and financial planning. Her work has been featured in respected publications including the Financial Post, The Globe & Mail, and the Edmonton Journal.
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