Mar 31, 2026
It’s a question many remarried couples face: If one spouse passes away, what happens to the inheritance if there are children from a previous marriage?
Imagine Tammy, 55, and her husband Bill, 60. They’re both healthy, but Tammy’s sister recently passed away and Bill’s father is in a care home, so estate planning is top of mind for both of them.
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Bill has two adult children from a previous marriage. Tammy doesn’t have children of her own, and though she tried to cultivate a relationship with her stepchildren, they never made much of an effort to get to know her.
While Bill had about $250,000 in assets prior to the marriage, Tammy brought about $325,000 of her own assets into the marriage. They’ve since built up a $1-million nest egg and own their home.
Ultimately, it’s their money, and they can do what they want with it. Bill wants to leave everything to Tammy in his will. He says his kids are irresponsible and would waste an inheritance.
But Tammy fears that Bill’s position will strain her relationship with her stepchildren further.
She’s wondering if there’s an estate planning structure that would protect her financially while preventing a family ‘war’ if her husband passes away before she does.
On the other hand, if Bill outlives her, Tammy wants to leave her own assets to her late sister’s daughter.
Blended families mean complex estate planning
Blended families add complexity to estate planning, and there are a lot of blended families in the U.S. According to Census Bureau data (1), by 2021, more than one in five (21.2%) couples who lived together had children from a previous relationship.
That’s why it’s all the more important for partners in blended families to start early on an estate plan. Unfortunately, most people avoid end-of-life arrangements altogether.
Only about three in 10 U.S. adults (32%) have a will that “describes what to do with their assets and belongings after they die,” according to a study (2) by Pew Research Center. Most Americans don’t create a will until they’re in their 70s.
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If you die without a will — or intestate — the state where you live will determine how your assets are distributed, known as intestate succession. All this would take place in state probate courts.
The exception would be solely owned retirement accounts like 401(k)s and life insurance, which typically skip probate and go directly to the named beneficiary.
When it comes to intestate succession, states follow a hierarchy (3) to decide who inherits assets and how much, generally in this order:
- Spouse and children
- Parents and siblings
Some states follow the equitable distribution method, which means assets are split fairly depending on factors such as the duration of the marriage and the financial contributions of each spouse to the marriage (4).
In contrast, couples who prepare wills can bequeath their assets to whomever they wish (including to one another). Property acquired before marriage isn’t automatically split.
Thankfully, Bill has prepared a will and there are certain assets that will go directly to Tammy — including their joint bank accounts, investments they built together and their jointly owned home.
These are protected under joint tenancy with rights of survivorship (JTWROS) laws that govern assets jointly owned (5) by spouses. In such cases, when one owner dies, the assets pass to the other owner — no probate required.
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It would be a different matter if they owned their home as ‘tenants in common,’ meaning that Tammy would be considered to own only half the home upon Bill’s death.
In that scenario, Bill’s share of the home would go through probate and his children from his prior marriage (6) would inherit.
As it stands, Tammy stands to inherit everything, and wants to proactively address tensions with Bill’s children.
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Protect your blended family with a trust
If Bill dies, Tammy could give his two children some money, perhaps splitting the $250,000 in assets he brought into the marriage evenly to give to each of them.
However, there’s no guarantee that will improve Tammy’s relationship with her stepchildren, and they could still demand more.
If Bill’s main objection to his children inheriting his assets is that they’re bad with money, there may be another alternative that would protect Tammy for life and ensure something is left for his kids.
He could set up a Qualified Terminable Interest Property (QTIP) trust (7), a particularly useful tool for blended families.
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A QTIP trust ensures the surviving spouse receives regular income for life, and enjoys certain tax advantages.
Once the surviving spouse passes away, the balance is paid to the beneficiaries — in this case, Bill’s children.
Moreover, a QTIP trust would allow Bill to add a ‘spendthrift provision’ for beneficiaries who are financially irresponsible. Such a provision ensures that such beneficiaries receive distributions over time rather than everything as a lump sum.
It also protects the trustor’s assets from the beneficiary’s creditors (8).
In the meantime, Tammy may want to consider naming her niece as a beneficiary on her retirement accounts and life insurance, which means those assets would skip probate and go directly to her niece upon Tammy’s death — not her stepchildren.
In situations like Tammy’s, there is no right or wrong answer. If Bill doesn’t want to leave his money to his adult kids, that’s his right. Nor is Tammy under any obligation to explain her financial choices to her stepchildren.
She may not be able to avoid a ‘war’ with her stepchildren. However, it would be best if her husband talked to them about his wishes now, while he’s alive, rather than leaving his wife to deal with his children’s reactions after his death.
Article Sources
We rely only on vetted sources and credible third-party reporting. For details, see our editorial ethics and guidelines.
U.S. Census Bureau (1); Pew Research Center (2); Justia (3); LawInfo (4); Estate and Probate Legal Group (5); Bratton Law Group (6); Investopedia (7); 411 Probate (8)
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Vawn Himmelsbach is a veteran journalist who has been covering tech, business, finance and travel for the past three decades. Her work has been featured in publications such as The Globe and Mail, Toronto Star, National Post, Metro News, Canadian Geographic, Zoomer, CAA Magazine, Travelweek, Explore Magazine, Flare and Consumer Reports, to name a few.
