‘We refused to become house poor’: Portland family that rakes in $250K/year cannot afford a home without spending over 30% of their income — are they right to wait until the market cools?

Recently, Business Insider ran a story on Laura and Samuel Graves, a 36-year-old couple with two children who are stuck in a Portland apartment until home prices come down in their local market. The couple’s income would normally open up some options on the home-buying front, but the combination of Portland's elevated housing prices and high mortgage rates is forcing them to wait.

To be clear, it’s not as if this couple absolutely can’t buy a home. Rather, they specifically do not wish to become house poor, which is when you own a home but a large chunk of your income goes to home-related expenses, leaving little to put towards retirement savings and other expenses. But are they right to sit out the market and wait for it to cool? Or should they take the leap into homeownership sooner so they can start to build equity?

Keep in mind that if you’re waiting for interest rate cuts to buy a home, you could be waiting a long time. Some experts have warned that falling rates will bring little relief for potential homebuyers..

The case for waiting

The reason the Graves don’t want to buy a home now boils down to not wanting housing to monopolize too much of their income. The couple is looking to keep their housing costs to 30% of their monthly take-home pay of about $11,000. But most of the homes they're interested in would have them spending roughly half of their monthly income on housing, which is beyond their financial comfort zone.

But that line of thinking makes sense. As a general rule, it’s wise to keep housing expenses to 30% of your take-home income or less. Going beyond that point puts you at risk of missing housing payments or struggling to keep up with other expenses.

In fact, depending on your total living costs, 30% may be too high a percentage of your income to spend on housing. If you have a toddler needing child care, you may be spending $755 per week on a nanny or $293 a week on daycare, says Care.com. These figures represent the average costs for these services as of 2023. Or, if you’re someone who tends to spend a lot on medical bills, that, too, makes the case for keeping housing costs below 30% of your pay.

There’s a long-term danger of becoming house poor

Spending well more than 30% of your income on housing may not only put you at risk of falling behind on near-term bills. It could also impede long-term goals. Spending more on housing could mean not being able to fund a retirement account or build up savings for your children’s college education.

Plus, you may end up having to forgo non-financial goals if you spend too much on a house. Seeing the world could become more of a challenge if too much of your income is monopolized by mortgage payments.

Should you buy now and refinance later?

A big part of the reason so many people are struggling to buy homes today is that mortgage rates are elevated at a time when home prices are also stubbornly high. That's a brutal combination.