‘Do not lend anyone money that you are dating’: Sex and the City actress Kristin Davis was ghosted by a ‘very successful actor’ after lending him $5K. Here’s why you should follow her advice

She revealed that she once lent $5,000 to an ex-boyfriend — an “out-of-work actor” struggling to make ends meet — only to be ghosted soon after.

“I was at his house and he had all of these, ‘your electricity’s gonna be turned off,’ like all those notices that you get when you can’t pay your bills,” Davis shared. “And then I think he wrecked his motorcycle, which is like how he got around town to his auditions. And I was like, ‘Can I lend you some money?’”

Lending money to someone you're seeing can be tempting — especially if they're going through a tough time — but you might want to take a page from Davis’s book and err on the side of caution before opening your wallet.

Love and loans

Money issues can make or break even the most promising romance. Before giving your partner a loan, consider why they need the money in the first place. Are they dealing with a temporary setback, like a job loss? Or have they enjoyed one too many indulgent weekends?

Davis wishes she had thought twice before opening her wallet.

“Anyone listening, do not lend anyone money that you are dating,” she warned on her podcast.

For Davis, lending her partner $5,000 felt like the right thing to do as an act of support. But it soon “changed the dynamic” of their relationship. The once-frequent calls eventually stopped altogether.

As Fidelity’s vice president of education Meredith Stoddard points out, a lot of money conflicts emerge from a lack of communication — of which ghosting would be the extreme version.

Stoddard notes that financial discussions can be intimidating, especially when couples have different priorities or ideas about saving, spending, and investing. Talking about money requires a whole new level of intimacy.