Mar 19, 2026
Despite President Trump declaring victory over America’s affordability crisis, one of his own housing officials asked wedding guests to contribute to a down payment on a home.
Benjamin Hobbs, the assistant secretary for public and Indian housing with the Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD), made the request with his fiancée, Madison Joan Greif, on the digital registry for their June wedding (1).
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Aside from raising ethics alarm bells over a government official soliciting personal donations, FederalPay.org reports the average salary for Hobbs’s position is $130,218 (2) — well above the $120,000 on Realtor.com analyst says one needs to purchase a median-priced Washington, D.C., home, assuming you have a 10% down payment saved up (3).
Hobbs isn’t the only high-profile groom asking for money from wedding guests. Writer and actor Chaz Bono and his wife Shara Blue Mathes are planning to get married in Hollywood in March 2026 and requested donations to help pay for their Hawaiian honeymoon — which raised eyebrows, given the net worth of the groom’s mother, Cher, is believed to be upwards of $360 million (4).
These requests are part of a growing wedding trend. Forget “something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue” — more couples than ever are overtly asking for something green on their wedding day.
Why cash is king at weddings
Wedding gifts of money or jewelry are common in many cultures (5). But now, more Americans than ever are turning to cash registries in lieu of physical wedding gifts, highlighting the need to fund big-ticket purchases from honeymoons to houses.
“Registry trends are shifting to match the reality of modern life,” Samantha Kobrin, the brand director for wedding planning and registry website Zola, said. She added that “Since many couples already live together, they typically have the basics covered,” making funding “future financial milestones” more of a priority (6).
In fact, a 2025 Lending Tree survey found that, over the last two years, 48% of newlyweds asked guests for money for a home down payment as their wedding gift (7).
Zola’s research, meanwhile, shows that 86% of couples are cool with asking for cash, with the top three needs split between honeymoons, home purchases and wedding bills (8).
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The trend, perhaps, should come as no surprise. A January New York Times / Siena University poll found that housing affordability “stands out as the problem that’s most on the minds of young people.” Just 36% of 18- to 29-year-olds polled believe their home ownership dreams are attainable (or already attained), and it’s easy to see why (9).
The National Association of Realtors (NAR) Housing Affordability Index released this month put the median price for existing single family homes at $401,800 for February — up slightly year-over-year. They calculated that, with a 6.12% mortgage rate, buyers would need a qualifying income of $93,696. Depending on where you live, though, that median home price fluctuates between $304,400 to almost $610,000 (10).
Honeymoon funds, meanwhile, are the other priority. Honeyfund, Chaz Bono’s crowdfunding wedding registry of choice, puts the average honeymoon cost at $6,500 (11). But Zola notes that up to 70% of couples put a hold on their regular savings to pay for the wedding (average cost: $36,000), meaning a cash registry funding the honeymoon helps save them from “completely sacrificing their financial health later” (6).
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How to ask for cash, and give it
Asking for cash from wedding guests might feel awkward for some couples — an issue exacerbated by improper etiquette.
“If you are requesting monetary gifts for your wedding, there is a tasteful way to go about it so it’s a win-win situation for everyone,” Mariah Grumet, author and etiquette expert, told Brides magazine (12).
One common tip is to put the cash request on the registry site and never on the wedding or shower invite. Another key is to explain what the cash registry is going toward. Zola suggests that, instead of just saying “honeymoon fund,” you should specify where you’ll travel. If you’re looking for help to buy a house, explain that you have the items to fill a home — you just need help saving for one (6).
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Be aware, though, that while online registries let guests gift money via credit card, according to the Knot, some charge service or handling fees that are either absorbed by your guests or come out of the cash fund (13). As such, it’s important to do your research before picking a registry platform.
Etiquette experts also advise that you add actual physical items to the registry, for those who prefer to buy gifts over giving cash, according to Today’s Bride. And make sure you have a table at the wedding for physical gifts, and a box for those cash-stuffed envelopes (14).
Speaking of cash, if you’re gifting it, or a cheque, to newlyweds, Brides magazine says to always include it in a card rather than an empty envelope (15). And if you prefer not to give money, check out the registry for alternative options you’re more comfortable gifting.
As for the amount you should give, some suggest (15) that the expectation tops out at $250, though others say the average hovers around $150 (16). The amount can fluctuate for many reasons, from the closeness of your relationship with the couple to your own financial situation.
“The magic number for how much you should spend on a wedding gift depends on what fits your budget,” Lizzie Post, co-president of the etiquette organization The Emily Post Institute, says (16). “You should give a gift that’s worth what you can afford to give comfortably.”
Article Sources
We rely only on vetted sources and credible third-party reporting. For details, see our editorial ethics and guidelines.
The Washington Post (1); FederalPay.org (2); Realtor.com (3); Yahoo Entertainment (4); Springfield CC (5); Zola (6); LendingTree (7); Zola (8); The New York Times (9); National Association of Realtors (10); Honeyfund (11); Brides (12); The Knot (13); Today’s Bride (14); Brides (15); The Knot (16)
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Mike Crisolago is a Staff Reporter at Moneywise with more than 15 years of experience in the journalism industry as a writer, editor, content strategist and podcast host. His work has appeared in various Canadian print and digital publications including Zoomer magazine, Quill & Quire and Canadian Family, among others. He’s also served as a mentor to students in Centennial College’s journalism program.
