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Budgeting
A little flexibility goes a long way when it comes to financial planning. ilonadesperada/Envato

I’m 35 and I saved aggressively throughout my entire 20s. Now I feel like I missed out. How do I find a better balance moving forward?

Laura has always been the planner in her friend group. She’s spent years keeping her eyes on the future, saving every penny she could. Growing up without much money made financial stability her top priority.

But now that she’s 35, she feels like she missed out on what were supposed to be her carefree, spend-a-little-more, enjoy-life years. When she looks at her friends, many of them are in the same financial boat — except they didn’t hesitate to travel, go to concerts, or take time off in their 20s.

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Now Laura’s starting to wonder if all that scrimping and saving was really worth it.

Saving money, but missing out

Working hard and saving wasn’t just something Laura did — it was part of her plan long before she even started college. She knew student loans were unavoidable, so she got a part-time job in high school and saved every dollar she could to keep her future loan balance — and interest — as low as possible.

She kept that momentum going in college. While her friends were off on spring break, she was picking up extra shifts at the restaurant where she worked.

After graduation, she jumped straight into her career. Determined to pay off her loans fast, she cut expenses anywhere she could: packing her lunch every day, living with multiple roommates, and driving a hand-me-down car.

Now, all that planning has paid off. She lives in a major midwestern city, and is making just over $90,000 a year as a human resources specialist for a tech company. Her student loans are long gone, and she’s been contributing the maximum amount to her 401(k) that her employer will match, so now she has $150,000 in retirement savings. This means she is on track for her age range when it comes to retirement savings. (1)

By saving and investing since she was in her 20s, Laura has reaped the benefits of compound interest. When she is ready to retire, her savings could be as much as double what they would have been if she began saving for retirement in her mid-30s.

Laura also has an emergency fund that could cover six months of expenses, which she keeps in a high-yield savings account.

She also owns a condo. She made the decision to purchase a two-bedroom unit, so that she could have a roommate, whose rent helps pay down the mortgage.

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Even after all that effort, Laura is starting to second-guess the years she spent saving. She wishes she’d taken more trips, gone to those concerts she turned down, and allowed herself to be a little more carefree. It feels like everyone around her ended up in a similar financial spot — only they also got to enjoy their 20s. Now she’s worried she played it too safe and missed out on a lot of great memories.

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Changing the balance in your budget

Laura can afford to add more joy and spontaneity to her life, and she’s earned it. But it may be hard for her to change her ways. She could consider changing her budget to ensure that it includes room for her wants, not just her savings and expenses. An example of this strategy is the 50/30/20 budget, which allocates 50% for needs, 30% for wants and 20% for savings.

For a saver like Laura, 30% on wants may be too big of a jump. She could also consider the 70/20/10 budget plan, which allocates 70% to living expenses, 20% to savings or debt and 10% to discretionary spending.

She could also decide on a bucket-list item that she wants to spend on, and then break down the cost, over six months, for example, and build it into her existing budget. Whatever she chooses, making a decision and factoring it into her budget will help her learn to loosen her grip on her spending, and start enjoying the life she’s worked so hard to achieve.

Social media mirage

Laura’s peers may appear to be fine financially, but according to Experian, the average debt Americans carry has reached $104,755 as of mid-2025. (2) Remember, people post the things they want you to see online, like vacations and dinners out, but they’re not posting about their credit scores or high-interest credit card debt.

Since Laura is so good at saving and following a plan, by factoring joyful experiences into her budget, she can easily follow a new plan that she sets for herself. A plan that includes fun is still a plan, after all.

Taking the same regimented approach to saving as to spending, she can be sure to enrich her life with the experiences she finds valuable. It may seem counterintuitive, but she already has the skills in place — she just needs to change her goal.

Article sources

We rely only on vetted sources and credible third-party reporting. For details, see our editorial ethics and guidelines.

Fidelity (1); Experian (2)

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Rebecca Payne Contributor

Rebecca Payne has more than a decade of experience editing and producing both local and national daily newspapers. She's worked on the Toronto Star, the Globe and Mail, Metro, Canada's National Observer, the Virginian-Pilot and Daily Press.

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