May 24, 2026
Marie from Ohio called into The Ramsey Show recently with a story both heartbreaking and cautionary: Her live-in boyfriend had secretly spent nearly $17,000 across two of her credit cards. She only discovered it after scrutinizing her finances closely.
Marie mentioned she’d handed her credit card to a pest control company for a recurring monthly charge, with her boyfriend agreeing to cover it as his household expense. What she didn’t know was that he was also using her card to pay for their joint car insurance, buy auto parts and cover other personal expenses — all while intercepting the paper statements before she could see them in the mail.
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By the time she caught on in 2023, one card had ballooned to nearly $11,000. A second card, a Lowe’s account she wasn’t even aware he was using, had another $5,600 on it.
Marie paid both down somewhat before calling in, leaving balances of $8,100 and $4,900, but she’s still on the hook for roughly $13,000 total, all in her name.
Why she may have little recourse
The hosts were candid about where she stands.
As cohost Rachel Cruze noted, “if you willingly gave your credit card over and you just have a crappy boyfriend who’s not paying it, that’s more on you guys. That’s not a legal standing.”
While the hosts advised her to contact both credit card companies, flag those specific charges as unauthorized and ask if they can be reversed, his use of her cards still leads back to her.
According to the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau (CFPB), “unauthorized use is defined as use of a credit card by someone who doesn’t have the right to use the card.” But critically, if you gave the card to someone, you’ve authorized the use.
The CFPB also notes if that person then uses the card for a different purpose, it may still be considered authorized use, and you remain responsible until you notify your card issuer that the person is no longer permitted to use the account.
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A critical nuance
This is the catch for Marie. She might remain responsible for charges she doesn’t know about until she notifies her card issuer that her boyfriend is no longer permitted to use the account.
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That makes the car insurance payments and auto part purchases on the original card harder to dispute than they might appear. The Lowe’s card may be a different matter, since Marie had no knowledge he was using that account at all, making it the stronger fraud claim of the two.
According to the CFPB, if unauthorized use of a card occurs before you report it missing, the most you’re liable for is $50 — and many cardholder agreements hold you to zero liability. If your account number is used without your knowledge and you never lost the physical card, you generally have no liability at all.
She’s far from alone
Marie’s situation reflects a documented pattern. According to the Pennsylvania Coalition Against Domestic Violence, financial abuse occurs in the vast majority of abusive relationships, and 78% of Americans don’t recognize it as a form of domestic violence. Misuse of a partner’s credit — without their knowledge — falls squarely within that definition.
Beyond the relationship angle, a report from Security.org found that roughly one in three U.S. adults experienced a fraudulent charge in the past year alone, totaling an estimated $6.1 billion in unauthorized charges. And 22% of fraud victims reported recurring unauthorized charges from the same source, nearly double from the prior year.
Read More: Dave Ramsey says this 7-step plan ‘works every single time’ to kill debt, get rich in America — and that ‘anyone’ can do it
Where to go from here
The show’s advice to Marie was simple: cut off all financial access, close any compromised accounts and freeze her credit with all three major bureaus — TransUnion, Equifax and Experian — so no new accounts can be opened in her name. As Cruze put it, “Who knows what he would do when he gets pissed that you evict him.”
Beyond that, the National Consumer Law Center advises submitting any dispute in writing to your card issuer, not just reporting it over the phone, as written billing error notices carry advantages over verbal reports alone.
If the credit card companies don’t budge, Marie may be left paying what the show grimly calls “stupid tax” — a hard financial lesson with no legal remedy. But the steps she takes now can limit the damage and ensure history doesn’t repeat itself.
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With a writing and editing career spanning over 15 years, Emma creates and refines content across a broad spectrum of industries, including personal finance, lifestyle, travel, health & wellness, real estate, beauty & fitness and B2B/SaaS/tech.
