When it comes to wedding ceremonies, it's considered a time-honored tradition to throw rice on the happily married couple. Some people opt to throw fists instead.
So what really happens when a guest yells, "I object!" in the middle of a wedding ceremony? Luckily, it's not legally binding --- but it sure can be embarrassing (especially after you've stretched your savings to the max for your perfect day). In fact, many people are omitting the clause from their wedding vows altogether, and after reading these Reddit stories, you'll understand why.
Here are 25 stories from people who witnessed objections as they were happening and lived to tell the tale.
The following stories have been edited for length, grammar and clarity.
1. Shotgun wedding
My wife dragged me to a wedding that I did NOT want to be at years ago but I'm forever grateful that she did, because I was able to witness one of the greatest spectacles of human drama that has ever taken place. This was like an episode of Jerry Springer mixed with Cops.
Bride's LOVER spoke up at that moment and yelled, "I'll be darned if I'm gonna keep my mouth shut and let you steal my woman, you sorry sucker!" This deranged old redneck proceeds to come at the groom WITH A PISTOL threatening to hurt him if he doesn't give her up.
It wasn't a huge wedding, maybe 40 or so people but every single one of them went screaming and running. Maybe two people stayed and called the cops. I grabbed my wife's hand and we retreated outside to watch the rest of the scene unfold from the church window.
2. Tie the NOT!
The best man at my step sister’s wedding did this. It happened at the rehearsal the night before. It was a very large wedding and the rehearsal was bigger than a lot of weddings.
The minister was going over the vows quickly while giving instructions on what to do.
When he said something about objections, the best man interrupted saying he had to put a stop to this. He was in love with the bride and was sure she felt the same way. My sister and everyone else was horrified. It caused plenty of chaos and confusion.
After that, neither the bride nor the groom ever spoke to him again.
3. Sealed with a fish
Mom got married to my stepdad, Uncle objected... After the attention was focused on him, he just asked if they were still going fishing afterwards.
To which my stepdad reached into his suit and pulled out his fishing hat. Very sweet and bromantic.
4. Married treasure
A member of my wife's family had a pirate-themed wedding. A rival pirate appeared and objected to the wedding. The groom dueled him with rapiers and won.
5. A love triangle (or square, or ... pentagon)
A wedding I was at, one guy got up and pledged his undying love for the bride, followed by four or five others objecting for various reasons including one guy's love for the groom.
By the second or third objection, though, it was clear that the whole thing was a clever ruse.
I found out later that it was all set up by the bride as a prank on the unsuspecting groom and family and friends. It was pretty hilarious!
6. Runaway grooms
This happened very recently, but in a different manner.
For years, Groom and Best Man are super close, room together, and the running joke is that they’re more than friends. Later on, Groom meets Bride, falls in love, and proposes. New running joke is that Best Man is very disappointed that Groom is marrying someone else.
At the wedding, officiant asks if anyone has objections. Best Man objects. Officiant quickly overrules the objection. It was planned, and Bride thought it was a funny way to acknowledge the super close friendship between Groom and Best Man.
Did not result in anyone being kicked out or awkwardness. Fun and surprisingly appropriate.
7. Just buried
I saw it nearly happen at my uncle’s wedding. A friend of theirs had too many beverages, and when the officiant said, “Speak now or forever hold your peace” he smiled and started to stand up. My mother grabbed him by his hair and sat him back down by force.
8. Dearly beloved (or 'barely tolerated')
My friend almost paid me to do it at my dad’s wedding and I was so close to agreeing, but my dad overheard and stopped me.
I would have done it for free if I knew how crazy that woman was back then…
9. Say your cows
It was at my wedding that we had at my grandmother's house who lives out in the country next to a cattle farm. The cows didn’t make a peep until the “I object” moment, and one finally went "moo."
We all laughed and continued but it was a funny moment about my wedding.
10. Thinly veiled insults
At my cousin’s wedding when the exchanging of vows took place, my aunt shouted, “Wasn’t there supposed to be a part where you could object?”
11. Erupting nuptials
I was at an outdoor ceremony once, with a storm coming in. The pastor was trying to move things along so that we wouldn't get caught in the rain (the reception was indoors). He asked if anyone knows of any objection, and instantly, there was a loud clap of thunder.
To his credit, the pastor just paused a moment and then said: "Anyone else? Alright, in that case..." and finished the ceremony.
12. After the ceremony comes deception
I was working at a wedding when I was younger. I was running the bar at the reception, which was very close to the hall the weddings were at. We were told that the reception would begin around 4 p.m. It was already about 3 p.m.-ish and I was packing fridges, the usual bar man things, while one of the male guests was still sitting there putting them back.
I asked if he was not joining the reception, to which he replied something along the lines of, “when I have the courage.” He downs his drink and leaves.
10 minutes later he’s back, looking extremely disappointed. Guy orders a drink, and less than 30 seconds later another guy who’s dressed extremely well (turned out to be the groom), walks in, punches him in the back of the head, and leaves. This dude just picked himself up and kept sipping further.
I eventually found out that he had walked into the reception, admitted to having an affair with the bride the night of her bachelorette party, and again the night before the wedding. He was never invited to the wedding, he just felt the groom needed to know. So he found out where the wedding was, suited up and dropped the info mid-party.
13. Here comes the tide
At my own wedding, but not in the traditional way. We were getting married along a river at the end of summer and tons of wakeboarders and boats were out. I was a ball of nerves and the ceremony felt so serious... when all of a sudden some dude on a boat blasting music screamed, “Don’t do it, bro!” and sped off.
It was actually hilarious and made the rest of the ceremony a lot more fun. My husband and I cracked up even though his brothers looked like they were about to jump in the river after the guy!
14. Everlasting love (or less than a decade)
I was a baby when my mom married my stepdad. During the objection portion, I yelled, "STOP!" but no one listened. They divorced six years later.
I told you, Mom. I told you.
15. A storybook bromance
To be fair, I didn't witness this, but it happened to my parents. My mom invited an ex (they were friends) to her wedding and he stood up and yelled, "I object!"
Little did everyone at the wedding know, my dad had gotten rather close with him and paid him to stand up and object just for giggles. He bursted out laughing. My mom didn't find it as funny.
16. Something old, something WHO?
I used to be an audio engineer, I was running sound for this one small chapel. The officiant got to the “I object” portion of the ceremony. A woman stood up and said something, my station was recessed into the wall and I couldn't quite hear her, she spoke for five or six seconds and the room had a few upset/shocked sounds.
Another woman on the side of the room near me just spoke up saying, "Don't you listen to nothing she has to say! You two go ahead and get married!"
The room laughed and the ceremony persisted.
17. Brawling betrothed
This was in the early 70s in semi-rural Washington state. My cousin was getting married, and my aunt and the mother of the groom did not get along well.
During the ceremony, when the pastor got to the part about objecting, my aunt said something to my uncle and the groom’s mom jumped up and grabbed my aunt by the hair, and they started going at it, all the way out the door and into the parking area.
They were separated, and everyone filed back into the barn, where the wedding continued.
18. I 'duel'
It was a medieval-themed wedding. The best man declared his love for the bride. Challenged the groom to a fight for her love. They march outside draw swords and go at it.
Apparently they choreographed two nights a week for like six months, but it honestly looked like they were trying to kill each other. The groom wins and everything goes on like normal.
Weird, but cool.
19. Let's raise a toast (or a roast)
My cousin had her wedding on a farm with a massive pig roast. From what I remember, there was a massive amount of people. Anyway, her father and my other older cousin never really got along. At one point during the reception my older cousin had enough and absolutely lost it. He looked at a handful of us and asked if we had his back. Of course we all nodded not really knowing what was about to happen.
He disappeared and a few minutes later comes back with a 20 lb bag of pork meat from the leftover roast. He walks down to where my cousin’s dad is (my aunt proceeds to yell, “Lonnie NO!”) and smacks him right in the side of the face with the bag of meat. An all-out family brawl ensued.
The whole family hasn't been invited to a wedding ever since.
20. Walk down the trial
I was at my cousin’s wedding as a teen. During the part where the officiant asks, "Does anyone object?" all of the groomsmen huddled up for about 10 seconds, grunted and nodded affirmingly.
They went back to their standing positions and the best man gave a thumbs up.
21. Altar-ed perceptions
I was a waiter for a venue that had a lot of weddings. We typically watched the wedding ourselves from the second floor and waited for everyone to come up for the reception.
A guest for the wedding arrived a few hours early, so he sat in the restaurant and had a few too many drinks. He yelled "DON'T DO IT [bride’s name here]. HE DOESN’T DESERVE YOU."
There were the typical gasps in the crowd, then it was just silence as people from the bar (not part of the wedding, but the bar was outside on the same floor) escorted him out. I really want to know what happened.
22. Bouquet then...
When the pastor got to the part of ‘“or forever hold your peace,” the bride said, “Yes, I’d like to say something.”
Then she turned around to her guests and said, “I’d like to thank my maid of honor for sleeping with my fiance last night.”
With that, she threw her bouquet and stormed off. The story even made it on the radio at the time.
23. Lawfully wedded knife
When I was a very young lad, I attended a wedding in which a man stood up at the point of objection and exclaimed, "You forgot the breadknife."
For the next 15 years my brother and I were convinced that it was wedding tradition to have a breadknife and forgetting it was a mortal sin. Turns out the guy was just nuts.
24. Pastor present
At my wedding the officiant said, "If anyone finds reason these two should not be wed, now is not the time. You've had years. But find me after the ceremony. I love gossip."
25. 'Til death do us part
Had a friend object at my first wedding.
He came right up to the altar, spouting off about all my shortcomings. Myself and my groomsmen all leveled our guns at him, but he just wouldn't shut up. So we fired.
He lay in a heap on the ground for the rest of the ceremony. Mind you, this was all planned. It was a pirate-y, renaissance-y wedding, and the guns were black powder (sans the shot, of course).
We all played our parts a bit too well, though... A few of the more gullible guests thought there'd been a legit murder at the wedding, at first. It was awesome.