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Here's the story: The Studio City, California, house from The Brady Bunch has been on the market, market, market!
A bidding war ensued -- and HGTV says it won, beating out Lance Bass and other would-be buyers. The home improvement network is promising to restore the iconic split-level "to its 1970s glory."
That will take a major makeover -- much more than slapping on a black wig and calling yourself "the new Jan Brady." Click along and see for yourself that the house may be beautiful, but it's not very Brady.
1. The front door looks familiar
The house is said to be the second most photographed home in America, after the White House. And from the street, it's pretty clear why — the outside is selfie-ready, looking pretty much the way it does in Brady reruns.
You can easily imagine Davy Jones walking to the door and getting ready to ring the bell, so he could totally rock the world of his No. 1 fan, Marcia Brady.
She was stunned when she met her favorite Monkee. You might feel that way when you see the inside of the house.
2. The living room: It's time to change
If the goal is to make the house look just like on the show, then it's time to change. You've got to rearrange.
While the living room is lovely and has many 1970s touches, like wood paneling and even a rock wall around the fireplace, it's desperately in need of some Brady-era shag carpeting.
But if the piano comes with the house, it's perfect for rehearsing the Silver Platters.
3. The 1st floor: Don't play ball in here
Mom always said, "Don't play ball in the house." That's because there isn't much room to throw around a basketball in here: The home has about 2,500 square feet of space, probably smaller than you'd expect.
It's smaller than the average size of today's new homes, which is 2,776 square feet, according to the National Association of Homebuilders.
Back there next to the front door, you see a hint of the stairs to the second floor. It seems like a more conventional stairway than the Bradys' giant wooden staircase that was so perfect for family photos.
4. The kitchen: Paging Alice
It's hard to conjure up the aroma of pork chops and applesauce when you look at this kitchen because it's seriously lacking in avocado. As in the Bradys' avocado fridge, bread box and cabinet doors.
But there are plenty of cabinets, perfect for storing your George Glass and any other tableware named for imaginary boyfriends.
And could that be a double oven? Alice would be pleased!
5. The dining room: Roomy enough?
This dining area will need a bigger table, for eight Bradys. (Nine, after the arrival of Cousin Oliver.)
Because the Brady family never would have eaten in shifts at a smaller table. That would have been exhausting for poor Alice, and the kids surely would have fought over who got to go first.
The house was built in 1959 and was last sold in 1973 — the year The Brady Bunch began its final season.
Need a bigger house for your growing family? Calculate how much house you can afford.
6. Master bedroom: Oh, Miiiiiike
The house has two master suites, but only three bedrooms in all, according to Realtor.com.
We know the house on the TV show had four bedrooms: one for patriarch Mike and matriarch Carol; one for the boys; one for the girls; and one for Alice. (There was also Greg's groovy attic room in the later seasons.)
It's difficult to see any renovation turning this magnificent master into a replica of the Brady parents' room, where they doled out advice while reading magazines in bed. It might work better as the girls' room.
7. A bathroom not ready for battle
Unlike the Brady kids' shared bathroom, this one has only one sink.
That just won't work: Those toothpaste-spitting arguments in the bathroom between Greg and Marcia got heated enough when they had separate sinks to stand in front of.
But this is one of just three full baths in the Studio City house. So maybe one of the others has the familiar double sinks and doors on each end.
8. Hallway of fame
The long-time owners of the Brady Bunch house paid just $61,000 for it in 1973, the Los Angeles Times reports. That's less than $350,000 in today's dollars.
But its status as a pop culture icon has helped make the home considerably more valuable. It was listed for sale at nearly $1.9 million.
What's behind the doors in this hallway? Mike Brady's office? Or maybe the stairs leading up to Greg's hippie hideaway, where he transforms into Johnny Bravo.
9. The river you never heard about
The house sits on a 12,500-square-foot lot — more than a quarter of an acre.
And here's something the show and its producers should have capitalized on: The Los Angeles River is out back.
Just think of the possibilities. An episode could have had rebellious Jan or mischievous Bobby going for a swim, despite Mom's warnings. Or, Greg might have made the river into his favorite make-out spot.
10. A backyard big enough for Tiger
The backyard seems spacious. There's plenty of room for Tiger's doghouse.
You know, the one where he hid Cindy's precious Kitty Carryall doll. (Bad Tiger!)
But if it's going to be more authentic to the show, the yard will need one key feature: AstroTurf!
11. A similar sliding door
The real-life Brady Bunch house has a sliding door out to the back patio, not too different from the sliding glass doors off the Bradys' den.
But be careful, Marcia: Walk out there, and you never know when a football might come flying your way. ("Oh, my nose!")
You also have to watch out for a Peter Brady-style volcano out on the patio that could go erupting all over you and your friends.
12. An American classic
Something suddenly came up? Hop out to your car parked in the home's "gated motorcourt." There's also a large, separate garage. The original garage became part of a lower level family room expansion, the Times says.
We'll close with the spot-on description of the house by listing agent Ernie Carswell: "This residence is a perfect postcard of American 70’s style and its special culture."
Or, as Greg Brady would say, it's far out!
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